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3 Rules for the Joe Rogan debate with Joe Biden and Donald Trump

Cocaine, Nut Punches, and DMT: How to properly conduct a Presidential Debate

Written by Jeff Siegel
Posted September 14, 2020


So Joe Rogan has offered to host a 4-hour debate between Trump and Biden.

And honestly, I kind of like the idea.

Although I do think there should be a few rules, though. 

  1. No speed, adderall, cocaine or any kind of stimulant.  I want to see how fast those brain hamsters move on that wheel without being chemically prodded.
  2. A fact checker will be on hand.  If a candidate lies, the other candidate gets to give him one nut punch.  And at the end of each hour, for each lie told during that hour, the candidate will have to do 10 burpees. 
  3. No interrupting while the other person is speaking.  If you interrupt, you’ll be forced to wear a ball gag dipped in DMT until the other person is done speaking.

In all seriousness, I would like to see the candidates speak for more than 2 to 3 minutes at a time, which is all traditional debates allow.  Those things offer nothing but pre-strategized sound bites, and offer no value to voters.  

And while I know that Rogan has not spoken highly of Biden, I do think it would be good to have Biden there, in person, so Rogan’s listeners, and really, the rest of the world, can have a better opportunity to see who really is the most mentally stable.  

Because, yes, that’s we are now.

Voting for the candidate who is the most mentally stable.

Well, we did have a good run, didn’t we?

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