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3 Reasons Elon Musk Would Take Tesla Private

Haven’t you learned? Elon Musk always wins!

Written by Jeff Siegel
Posted August 7, 2018 at 10:47PM

It never takes long for the haters to come out of the woodwork.

Scurrying around the Internet like vile cockroaches darting for the exits when the lights come on, purveyors of misinformation and professional short sellers who get off on the prospect of good companies losing money, took to Twitter, Facebook, and various message boards today to cry like little bitches.

Even the serial bashers were quick to put out the eye-catching headlines.

My favorite was …

Tesla’s Elon Musk just Invited a Big Lawsuit

Here’s an excerpt from that piece, which appeared on Yahoo! Finance …

Electric carmaker Tesla (TSLA) could be going private, according to a tweet by its mercurial CEO, Elon Musk. If true, it’s a boon for shareholders.

But if it’s not true, Tesla is in trouble, and shareholders may feel the pain. “If funding is secured, then it’s a factual statement,” says John C. Coffee, director of the Center on Corporate Governance at Columbia Law School. “But if he can’t prove that, he’s in some danger of a big lawsuit because short sellers will be devastated by this.”

Oh no! People who are betting on the company to fail will be devastated!

Give me a fucking break.

Look, I don’t own shares of Tesla, and haven’t owned shares of Tesla since it was trading around the $240 to $260 range. So I have no skin in the game either way. But I’d be lying if I said I’m not rooting for Tesla to not only succeed, but to prove all the naysayers wrong.

Elon Musk already did it once by successfully bringing to market the first all-electric vehicle that didn’t look or drive like a golf cart in a senior living community in Del Boca Vista.

And quite frankly, I believe he’ll do it again by making Tesla one of the most important companies of the 21st century. In fact, one could argue he’s already done it.

Don’t Bet Against Elon Musk

Now it’s true that I am what many Tesla-bashers like to call a “fan boy.” I would prefer the term, “Tesla Enthusiast,” but I lose no sleep over the former moniker.

In fact, as an unapologetic “fan boy,” I’d like to propose three reasons Elon Musk would want to take Tesla private. And not one of these reasons has to do with him trying to pump the stock.

Reason #1 - Spite

Make no mistake: If Musk can take Tesla private at $420 a share, the shorts will get crushed. And when you have billions of dollars, you can do shit like that - just out of spite. Full disclosure: I’m just being sarcastic.

Reason #2 - To reward the people who actually give a shit about the success of the company

Being a public company is a pain in the ass for CEOs that are trying to build something of value, as opposed to just doing only what’s necessary to get from quarter to quarter without pissing off shareholders.

Building a viable electric car company in a world where oil companies and conventional auto manufacturers spent decades ensuring that the internal combustion engine lived far beyond it’s ability to be technologically relevant, was never something that could’ve possibly been “doable” in the short-term. To change the entire landscape of personal transportation from one that lived off the fumes of defeatism and complacency to one that integrated modern technology and common sense, is something that will take a very long time.

Understand, I don’t say this to pitch some kind of crazy conspiracy theory. This is just the reality of it all. And I don’t blame the oil companies or the conventional auto manufacturers. They were just doing that which was in their best interests. But I’m more concerned about the best interests of future generations that will now be able to live in a world where environmentally-friendlier forms of personal transportation are the norm, and not the exception.

Reason #3 - It makes a lot of sense

Elon Musk may have found a way to ensure that Tesla can get all the money and support it needs to create what will ultimately be the most popular car company in the world, and do so without having to constantly fight the finance writers and analysts that never had any interest in doing anything but shitting on the company.

Of course, even if Musk does take Tesla private, that doesn’t mean the haters will go gently into that good night.

Even if you take Wall Street out of the picture, there’s still an army of folks who continue to believe that any company looking to provide an environmentally-friendlier alternative to, well, just about anything, is an act of socialism brought forth by liberal democrats and overzealous treehuggers. But there’s nothing you can do about people like that except to help them repair their VHS players, typewriters, and rotary phones.

But make no mistake: What Elon Musk has accomplished over the past decade is truly phenomenal. Even if the company were to go belly up today, it would still go down as the most disruptive personal transportation company since the first Model T rolled off the line. And if you don’t believe that, then you’ve probably been shorting Tesla and losing a crap ton of cash.

I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again …

Never bet against Elon Musk.

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